Satura Apologia Today

The Campaign Trail – USA Presidential hopeful Joseph Smith outlined his plan for Government spending should he be elected the next President of the United States.

            “We are going to find Heavenly Father on day one.” Joseph Smith told eager LDS audiences. “As President, I would immediately boost funding for NASA so that our great, great astronauts can get to work finding Kolob.” Joseph Smith winked knowingly at his audience. “And who knows? We may even bring back some spirit babies!”

            The campaign promise was met with criticism by political pundits and the broader public alike. Questions such as “Where is Kolob” and “How do we bring immaterial spirit babies back to earth” were on everybody’s mind.

            At publishing time, Joseph Smith hit back at critics revealing that Kolob was in the same system as the Planet Vulcan and Mr. Spock would lead them there.