Satura Apologia Today

Salt Lake City, Utah – Second President of the Latter-Day Saint Church, Brigham Young had his work cut out for him. Young has been seen frantically trying to convince the world that Joseph Smith did in fact understand Egyptian and did not accidently translate the Book of Abraham from the Egyptian Book of the Dead.

            “Look here folks!” Young roared at a make reformed Egyptian great again rally. “Joseph Smith was as fluent in Egyptian as he was in gibberish. There ain’t nobody here who is going to tell me that our beloved prophet didn’t speak gibberish from time to time.” Young paused. “Oops, probably shouldn’t have said that.”

            In a statement, the LDS church said they could prove Smith’s fluency in gibberish by pointing out that it is identical with reformed Egyptian. The LDS Church did not reply to our request for comment.