Satura Apologia Today

Arabia – Have no fear the Calvinists are here! The word spreads across Arabia that John Calvin himself has arrived with a special message for the Islamic prophet. Calvin was popping by all prophets who disagreed with the Almighty to have a little chat.

            “Hey, it’s the Arabian Joseph Smith himself!” Calvin said upon seeing Muhammad. “Your skills at presenting a new Gospel are second only to the Latter - Day Saints!”

            Those close to Muhammad revealed that this was the prophet’s first encounter with a Calvinist. It was abundantly clear that the encounter was not a pleasant one. Muhammad shot back at Calvin saying that Calvin was the William Shakespeare of Christian theology and one of the dullest dudes in history and was probably predestined to remain that way.

            “Nah” Calvin replied. “My theology was predestined to be way cooler than yours.” Legend has it that Calvin put on a pair of sunglasses just to rub it in. Sources allege that Calvin planted a Tulip Garden near Muhammad’s home before he left.  

            Check out the latest on this story! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-Wo5YzAzDk