Satura Apologia Today

Carthage Illinois – After running out of scripture to exegete for his latest sermon, LDS prophet Joseph Smith conveniently received a new revelation from God to preach from. Joseph Smith’s latest sermon series will be expositing the script of the original Battlestar Galactica.

            Second LDS President Brigham Young expressed his gratitude to Heavenly Father that he never had to make up his own sermons. “There is so much new revelation, I just repeat what Heavenly Father says verbatim every Sunday,” Young said.

            Fifth LDS President Lorenzo Snow told congregants on Sunday that they were starting a brand-new series that really was brand new because God had just given it to him the previous evening.

            In related news, Pastor Charles Haddon Spurgeon is still faithfully expositing the Bible.